KIRTAN ILLUMINATIONS

SWALLOWED BY DESIRE

Earnest prayers for Śrī Kṛṣṇa’s shelter.

By Śrīla Narottam Dās Ṭhākur

 

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The format of the verse translations below is as follows:

  1. The original text of each verse in Bengali script,
  2. The original text of each verse in roman transliteration,
  3. A verse-ordered word by word gloss of each verse,
  4. A prose-ordered word by word gloss of each verse,
  5. A prose translation of each verse.
  6. Explanatory notes where applicable.

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তুমি ত দয়ার সিন্ধু অধম জনার বন্ধু
মোরে প্রভু কর অবধান ।
পড়িনু অসত্-ভোলে কাম-তিমিঙ্গিলে গিলে
ওহে নাথ কর পরিত্রাণ ॥১॥

tumi ta dayāra sindhu adhama janāra bandhu
more prabhu kara avadhāna
paḍinu asat-bhole kāma-timiṅgile gile
ohe nātha kara paritrāṇa [1]

tumi–You; ta–indeed; dayāra–of mercy; sindhu–ocean; adhama–lowly; janāra–of people; bandhu–friend; more–to me; prabhu–Lord; kara–please give; avadhāna–attention; paḍinu–I have fallen; asat–unreal; bhole–in bewilderment; kāma–desire; timiṅgile–by the ‘whale-swallower’ gile–swallowed; ohe–O; nātha–Lord; kara–please do; paritrāṇa–rescue. [1]

tumi–You [are] ta–indeed sindhu–an ocean  dayāra–of mercy [and] bandhu–the friend janāra–of persons [who are] adhama–lowly. prabhu–O Master! avadhāna kara–Please give [Your] attention more–to me. paḍinu–I have fallen bhole–into the bewilderment asat–of the unreal [and] gile–been swollowed timiṅgile–by the ’whale-swallower’ kāma–of desire. ohe–O nātha–Lord! paritrāṇa kara–Please rescue [me]. [1]

You are an ocean of mercy and the friend of the lowly. O Master! Please give me Your attention. I have fallen into the bewilderment of the unreal and been swallowed by the timiṅgila of desire. O Lord! Please rescue me.

timiṅgile: “By the timiṅgila.” The timiṅgila, lit. ‘whale-swallower’, is the foremost of sea creatures according to Vijayadhvaja Tīrtha’s commentary on Śrīmad Bhāgavatam: 2.6.44. The timiṅgila is sometimes thought to be equivalent to the Megalodon. Śrīla Narottam Ṭhākur’s comparison of material desire (kāma) to the timiṅgila is meant to convey that it is all-encompassing and inescapable by one’s own means, that is, without the shelter and grace of Śrī Kṛṣṇa.

যাবৎ জনম মোর অপরাধে হৈনু ভোর
নিষ্কপটে না ভজিনু তোমা ।
তথাপিহ তুমি গতি না ছাড়িহ প্রাণপতি
আমা সম নাহিক অধমা ॥২॥

yāvat janama mora aparādhe hainu bhora
niṣkapaṭe nā bhajinu tomā
tathāpiha tumi gati nā chhāḍiha prāṇapati
āmā sama nāhika adhamā [2]

yāvat–since; janama–birth; mora–my; aparādhe–in offence; hainu–I have been; bhora–immersed; niṣkapaṭe–sincerely; –not; bhajinu–I have served; tomā–You; tathāpiha–still; tumi–You; gati–shelter; –not; chhāḍiha–reject; prāṇa–heart; pati–Lord; āmā–as I; sama–as; nāhika–there is no one; adhamā–lowly. [2]

yāvat–Since  mora–my janama–birth, hainu–I have been bhora–immersed aparādhe–in offences, [and] bhajinu nā–I have not served tomā–You niṣkapaṭe–sincerely. tathāpiha–Still, tumi–You [are my] gati–shelter. chhāḍiha nā–Please do not reject [me,] pati–O Lord prāṇa–of [my] heart! nāhika–There is no one sama–as adhamā–lowly āmā–as I. [2]

Since my birth, I have been immersed in offences, and I have not served You sincerely. Still, You are my shelter. Please do not reject me, O Lord of my heart! There is no one as lowly as I.

পতিত-পাবন নাম ঘোষণা তোমার শ্যাম
উপেখিলে নাহি মোর গতি ।
যদি হই অপরাধী তথাপিহ তুমি গতি
সত্য সত্য যেন সতী পতি ॥৩॥

patita-pāvana nāma ghoṣaṇā tomāra śyāma
upekhile nāhi mora gati
yadi ha-i aparādhī tathāpiha tumi gati
satya satya yena satī pati [3]

patita–fallen; pāvana–purifier; nāma–name; ghoṣaṇā–proclamation; tomāra–Your; śyāma–Śyām; upekhile–if [You] ignore; nāhi–not; mora–my; gati–shelter; yadi–if; ha-i–I am; aparādhī–offender; tathāpiha–still; tumi–You; gati–shelter; satya–truly; satya–truly; yena–just as; satī–chaste wife; pati–husband. [3]

tomāra–Your nāma–name pāvana–‘Purifier patita–of the fallen’ [has been] ghoṣaṇā–proclaimed, śyāma–O Śyām! upekhile–If You ignore [me], mora nāhi–I will have no gati–shelter, [and even] yadi–if ha-i–I am aparādhī–an offender, tathāpiha–still tumi–You [are my] gati–shelter, satya–truly, satya–truly, yena–just as pati–a husband [is the shelter] satī–of a chaste wife. [3]

Your name ‘Patita-pāvana’ has been proclaimed, O Śyām! If you ignore me, I will have no shelter, and even if I am an offender, still You are my shelter, truly, truly, just as a husband is the shelter of a chaste wife.

তুমি ত পরম দেবা নাহি মোরে উপেখিবা
শুন শুন প্রাণের ঈশ্বর ।
যদি করোঁ অপরাধ তথাপিহ তুমি নাথ
সেবা দিয়ে কর অনুচর ॥৪॥

tumi ta parama devā nāhi more upekhibā
śuna śuna prāṇera īśvara
yadi karo̐ aparādha tathāpiha tumi nātha
sevā diye kara anuchara [4]

tumi–You; ta–indeed; parama–supreme; devā–Lord; nāhi–not; more–me; upekhibā–ignore; śuna–please listen; śuna–please listen; prāṇera–of heart; īśvara–Lord; yadi–if; karo̐–I commit; aparādha–offence; tathāpiha–still; tumi–You; nātha–Lord; sevā–service; diye–giving; kara–make; anuchara–attendant. [4]

tumi–You [are] ta–indeed parama–the Supreme devā–Lord. upekhibā nāhi–Please do not ignore more–me. śuna–Please listen! śuna–Please listen! īśvara–O Lord prāṇera–of [my] heart! yadi–If aparādha karo̐–I commit offences, tathāpiha–still  tumi–You [are my] nātha–Lord. diye–Please grant [me] sevā–service [unto You and] kara–make [me Your] anuchara–attendant. [4]

You are the Supreme Lord. Please do not ignore me. Please listen! Please listen! O Lord of my heart! If I commit offences, still You are my Lord. Please grant me service unto You and make me Your attendant.

কামে মোর হত চিত্ত নাহি জানে নিজ হিত
মনের না ঘুচে দুর্ব্বাসনা ।
মোরে নাথ অঙ্গীকুরু ওহে বাঞ্ছাকল্প-তরু
করুণা দেখুক সর্ব্বজনা ॥৫॥

kāme mora hata chitta nāhi jāne nija hita
manera nā ghuche durvāsanā
more nātha aṅgīkuru ohe vāñchhā-kalpa-taru
karuṇā dekhuka sarva-janā [5]

kāme–with desire; mora–my; hata–wrought; chitta–mind; nāhi–not; m/jāne–recognise; nija–own; hita–good; manera–of mind; –not; ghuche–go away; durvāsanā–negative impression; more–me; nātha–Lord; aṅgīkuru–accept; ohe–O; vāñchhā–wish; kalpa–fulfilling; taru–tree; karuṇā–compassion; dekhuka–let see; sarva–all; janā–people. [5]

mora–My chitta–mind [is] hata–wrought kāme–with desire, [and]  jāne nāhi–I cannot recognise [my] nija–own hita–good. [My] manera–mind’s durvāsanā–negative impressions ghuche nā–do not go away. nātha–O Lord, aṅgīkuru–please accept more–me. ohe–O vāñchhā–wish- kalpa–fulfilling taru–tree, [let] sarva-janā–everyone dekhuka–see [Your] karuṇā–compassion. [5]

My mind is wrought with desire, and I cannot recognise my own good. The negative impressions in my mind do not go away. O Lord, please accept me. O wish-fulfilling tree, let everyone behold Your compassion.

durvāsanā: “Negative impressions.” Śrīla Viśvanāth Chakravartī Ṭhākur comments that this refers to viṣaya-bhoga-vāsanās, impressions in the mind that condition one to enjoyment of the objects of the senses.

মো-সম পতিত নাই ত্রিভুবনে দেখ চাই
নরোত্তম-পাবন নাম ধর ।
ঘুষুক সংসারে নাম পতিতপাবন শ্যাম
নিজ দাস কর গিরিধর ॥৬॥

mo-sama patita nāi tribhuvane dekha chāi
narottama-pāvana nāma dhara
ghuṣuka saṁsāre nāma patita-pāvana śyāma
nija dāsa kara giridhara [6]

mo–me; sama–equal; patita–fallen; nāi–is not; tribhuvane–in three worlds; dekha–look; chāi–see; narottama–Narottam; pāvana–purifier; nāma–name; dhara–please accept; ghuṣuka–may be proclaimed; saṁsāre–throughout world; nāma–name; patita–fallen; pāvana–purifier; śyāma–Śyām; nija–own; dāsa–servant; kara–make; giridhara–lifter of Govardhan. [6]

nāi–There is no one [as] patita–fallen sama–as mo–I tribhuvane–in the three worlds. dekha–Look [and] chāi–see. dhara–Please accept nāma–the name pāvana–‘Purifier narottama–of Narottam‘. [May Your] nāma–name pāvana–‘Purifier patita–of the fallen’ ghuṣuka–be proclaimed saṁsāre–throughout the world, śyāma–O Śyām! kara–Please make [me Your] nija–own dāsa–servant, giridhara–O lifter of Govardhan! [6]

There is so one so fallen as I in the three worlds. Look and see. Please accept the name ‘Narottama-pāvana’. May Your name ‘Patita-pāvana’ be proclaimed throughout the world, O Śyām! Please make me Your servant, O lifter of Govardhan!

নরোত্তম বড় দুঃখী নাথ মোরে কর সুখী
তোমার ভজন-সঙ্কীর্ত্তনে ।
অন্তরায় নাহি যায় এই ত পরম ভয়
নিবেদন করোঁ অনুক্ষণ ॥৭॥

narottama baḍa duḥkhī nātha more kara sukhī
tomāra bhajana-saṅkīrtane
antarāya nāhi yāya ei ta parama bhaya
nivedana karo̐ anukṣaṇa [7]

narottama–Narottam; baḍa–very; duḥkhī–sad; nātha–Lord; more–me; kara–make; sukhī–happy; tomāra–Your; bhajana–service; saṅkīrtane–in chanting; antarāya–obstacle; nāhi–not; yāya–go away; ei–this; ta–indeed; parama–greatest; bhaya–fear; nivedana–prayer; karo̐–I do; anukṣaṇa–constantly. [7]

narottama–Narottam [is] baḍa–very duḥkhī–sad. nātha–O Lord, kara–please make more–me sukhī–happy bhajana–in service [and] saṅkīrtane–chanting tomāra–of You. [That these] antarāya–obstacles yāya nāhi–do not go away— ei–this ta–indeed [is my] parama–greatest bhaya–fear. [Thus,] nivedana karo̐–I pray [to You] anukṣaṇa–constantly. [7]

Narottam is very sad. O Lord, please make him happy in service and chanting of You. That these obstacles will not go away is my greatest fear. Thus, I pray to You constantly.

antarāya: “Obstacles.” Śrīla Viśvanāth Chakravartī Ṭhākur comments that this refers to kāmādi-kṛta-vighnas, the obstacles created by desire and other vices.

Composition: This song originates from Śrīla Narottam Dās Ṭhākur‘s Prema-bhakti-chandrikā (33–39).